Your Bedtime Routine Is Perfect. Here's Why the Nights Are Still Hard.
The Secret to Better Baby Sleep Starts at 7am
(Not 7pm)
You've nailed the bedtime routine. The dim lights, the bath, the same three books in the same order. But the nights are still rough, and you can't figure out why.
Here's something most parents don't realise: what happens during the day has just as much to do with how your baby sleeps at night as anything you do at bedtime. A well structured day is the foundation everything else is built on.
Let me break it down.
Same wake time, every day
I know. When your baby has been up half the night, sleeping in feels like survival. But a consistent wake time is one of the most powerful things you can do for their sleep. It anchors their body clock, keeps nap times predictable, and sets the whole day up to run smoothly. Try to keep it within 15 minutes either way, even on the hard mornings.
Naps at consistent times each day
Overtired babies don't sleep better. They sleep worse. Keeping naps at consistent times means their body starts to anticipate sleep and the resistance drops. The timing will shift as they grow, but the consistency is what counts.
Full feeds during the day
A baby who snacks through the day will make up for those missed calories at night. Aim for full, satisfying feeds during waking hours and you'll often find those night wakes start to space out naturally. It's not always the whole picture, but it's a bigger piece of it than most people realise.
Active play before sleep
Babies need to burn energy to sleep well, but timing matters. Active play, tummy time, and outdoor time earlier in the awake window gives their nervous system time to wind back down before sleep. A baby going from high stimulation straight to the cot is a baby who fights sleep.
Wind down before naps, not just bedtime
Your bedtime wind-down is doing a lot of good, now apply the same thinking to naps. Even 10 minutes of quiet before a nap (closing the curtains, lowering your voice, a short book) signals to their brain that sleep is coming. That transition from busy to settled doesn't happen instantly, it needs a bridge.
What does a good nap schedule actually look like?
This changes a lot across the first two years, so here's a rough guide:
4–6 months
Most babies are on three naps at this age: a short morning nap, a longer lunchtime nap, and a brief late afternoon catnap to bridge to bedtime. Total daytime sleep is usually around 3–4 hours. Wake windows are short, often only 1.5–2 hours between sleeps, so watch for tired signs and don't push too long.
6–9 months
This is one of the trickiest stages because every baby is different. Some are ready to move to two naps, and some still genuinely need three. There's no one-size-fits-all answer here, and that's completely normal.
If your baby is still happily taking three naps and sleeping well overnight, there's no need to change anything. If however the third nap is becoming a consistent battle, bedtime is getting harder to achieve, or nights are becoming more disrupted, it could be a sign that the two-nap transition is on the horizon. The key is watching your baby rather than the calendar. A nap drop done too early almost always leads to overtiredness and harder nights. So if in doubt, hold on a little longer.
9–15 months
By this age, most babies have settled into two naps. A shorter morning nap and a longer lunchtime nap. The lunchtime nap is the most important sleep of the day and will stay (gradually shortening) right through to around age 2.5/3. If your baby is still on three naps heading into this stage, it's worth gently starting to work towards two.
15 months–2.5 years
One nap, the lunchtime nap. This is the stage where the routine really starts to feel manageable. A consistent wake time, lunch nap, and bedtime is all you need.
2.5–3.5 years
The nap drop. This is a gradual process and every child is different. Some drop it overnight, others take months to fully transition. During this phase, quiet time in the afternoon (even without sleep) helps keep overtiredness at bay.
How to tell if your baby is overtired or not tired enough
This is one of the most common things I work through with families, because it can look surprisingly similar from the outside.
Signs your baby is overtired:
Rubbing eyes, pulling at ears, or getting glassy-eyed
Becoming suddenly clingy or emotional
Arching their back or getting stiff
Falling asleep very quickly once settled (under 5 minutes)
Short naps (one sleep cycle only) and waking really upset
Waking frequently overnight or very early in the morning
Signs your baby isn't tired enough yet:
Chatting, rolling, or playing happily in the cot
Taking 30–45 minutes or more to fall asleep
Short naps (one sleep cycle only) but waking happy
Resisting naps consistently at the same time each day
If your baby is consistently overtired, the fix is usually earlier nap times and an earlier bedtime not a later one. I know that feels counterintuitive, but an overtired baby finds it harder to fall asleep and harder to stay asleep. Earlier often means longer sleep overall.
What to do when the routine falls apart
Because it will. Illness, travel, developmental leaps, teething, a late afternoon that ran away from you. These are all part of life with a baby.
Here's how to get back on track without starting from scratch:
Anchor to wake time first. Get back to a consistent wake time before anything else and the rest of the day will follow more easily.
Don't skip the wind-down. When things are off, the wind-down routine matters even more. It's the cue that brings their body back to ready-for-sleep mode.
Expect 2–3 days to resettle. After illness or a disrupted period, give it a few days of consistent routine before deciding something isn't working. Babies need time to readjust.
Bridging naps are your friend. (Under 6 months old) If an early morning wake has thrown the whole day out, a short 10-minute bridging nap can take the edge off and help you get back on track without throwing the rest of the day into chaos.
The days don't have to be perfect. They just need to be consistent.
You don't need a colour-coded schedule or a rigid minute-by-minute plan. You just need a predictable rhythm your baby can start to trust. When they know what's coming next, they settle more easily. For naps, for bedtime, and overnight.
If you'd like a starting point, my free Routines Guide has age-appropriate schedules from 4 months onwards. Grab it hereand see what a difference a well-structured day can make.
And if you've tried all of this and the nights are still hard, that's what I'm here for. Book a free call and let's figure out what's going on together.
I’ve got you,
Clare
Your baby sleep expert